For The Burnt Out & Broken

It still feels very unreal to me now but today I am celebrating my first year anniversary as a lawyer. Twelve months, two law firms, and a hundred pleadings later and I'm finally convinced that I am now an "attorney". I can still vividly remember how I jumped for joy and screamed to the top of my lungs when my friend called to tell me I was on the list of passers. It was an unbelievably surreal moment and even more so when I found out Erick and my cousin passed too.

What followed was the happiest, most amazing three months of my entire 28 years of existence. It was everything I have always dreamed of and then some. Seeing the bliss that was painted across my family's faces gave me an immense sense of fulfillment. Finally, all their hopes and dreams for me have come into fruition. There was no end to the victory parties, congratulatory greetings, and festivities. Everyday was a celebration! Having that 'lawyer' badge gave me so much satisfaction and ecstasy-- my heart was overflowing to the brim. I really couldn't ask for more... or so I thought.

As dramatic as this may sound but nine (9) days ago I hit rock bottom. For no specific reason, I just felt so depressed. My silent tears became inconsolable sobs and I sat on the floor of my room crying like a lost little girl, all alone in my apartment. Even before Sarah Geronimo was in the news for feeling "empty", I was already experiencing such heartbreaking malady. I realized I was so burnt out from all the work, the demands from clients, the feeling of defeat and from chasing deadlines after deadlines. What made it all the more depressing was the fact that I was very ill and feverish but I couldn't even lay my head to rest because of the countless responsibilities I had to take on. I was diagnosed with asthma but contrary to the doctor's advise, I barely rested. There simply was no time to physically heal and this made me feel so overwhelmed. I just wanted to press "ctrl+alt+delete" and just quit everything.

It's a sad reality that after finally getting what I have always hoped and yearned for, I realized that things were not as what I expected them to be. I was quickly growing cynical of the legal practice. I felt like writing pleadings was a drudgery on most days. The inexhaustible hostility between litigants has become so toxic. And it seemed like no matter how much money I was making, it could never compensate for the stress that I had to carry everyday. Other people's problems were my problem too and I was beginning to hate the idea. I honestly thought of leaving my profession and explore other alternatives. Yes, I went to that extent believe it or not.

After quieting my thoughts for a while, I confided to my close friends, including my boss, about what I was going through. I prayed and sought wisdom from the Lord on what to do. Out of all that contemplation and advice I got, one thing was clear: I NEED TO TAKE A BREAK. And take a break I did. I went on a two-day sick leave to see the doctor and actually have some decent sleep. I loaded up on fruits, vegetables and water. When I finally felt stronger I started exercising by going to the beach to swim. That short trip also gave me time to meditate and plan out my life. Although those days away from work seemed "unproductive", I forced myself to relax because I know deep down that this is the best thing I can ever do for my career and myself. True enough, I felt amazing after my hiatus. Today, I got back to the office feeling energized and excited for the work that I had to do, in complete contrast to the mess that I was a week ago. 

So what brought me out of that black hole I was in? The amazing grace of God and these simple yet life-altering lessons I've learned to embrace in the past week. Allow me to share some of them:

1. REST IS NON-NEGOTIABLE. Humans were designed for work AND leisure. There's not only a biblical but a scientific basis as well to the idea that we are to work for six days and rest on the seventh. Resting does not only make you enjoy the fruits of your labor but allows you to be recharged for the work that awaits the next day. There really is a need to stop every now and then and smell the flowers. When I stepped back from all the demands of my profession, I appreciated it even more (quite ironically so). I went back to work missing my desk, excited to listen to clients' problems and looking forward for the next pleading. Okay maybe the last one is a stretch but the point is, rest made me even more productive and appreciative of the tasks I am entrusted with. 

2. BE GRATEFUL IN EVERY LITTLE THING. Seeing all my facebook memories of all the posts about my passing the bar not only made me very sentimental but truly thankful as well. When the hype of victory died down and the honeymoon phase of being a new lawyer ended, I started to be so overwhelmed by the waves of responsibilities and problems thrown at me. I became so stressed out by phone calls, adverse decisions, absorbing the negative emotions of some clients and opponents, and the many deadlines I had to meet. I completely forgot that I actually signed up for all of this when I enrolled in law school. 

Now, I realize that in all my complaints I failed to see that I have so many victories in my cases, so many clients that have been helped, and so many reasons to be happy about being a lawyer. Nothing could compare to the heart-warming moments I have when my clients would extend their sincere "thank yous" every time I help them. And no greater joy is there than in knowing that I am fulfilling God's will for my life. Having an attitude of gratitude sounds like a cliche but it's every bit true. This kind of disposition brings sunshine on the rainiest days and fills you with happiness even amidst all the thousand reasons to frown.  

3. NOURISH YOUR BODY.  My dear friend, Atty. Pinky gave me an unconventional advice in getting out of depression: get your body moving! Actually, studies show that exercise naturally releases dopamine in the brain which promotes positive well-being and even counters negative mental states. This is why I have to go back to the gym asap! My asthma also weakened my body and apparently, it has also affected my emotional state. When my physical condition recovered from the onslaught of colds, fever and asthma attacks, I also felt so much better within. This is why now more than ever, I am  making a conscious effort to eat right, exercise regularly and boost my immune system. I am also cutting down my coffee intake and trying to drink green tea instead. All this is aimed at caring for this one and only body the Lord has given me and using it to glorify Him in the work that I do daily. 

4. NOURISH YOUR SOUL.  No matter how I try to fix my life and have all my ducks in a row, without a personal relationship with Christ, all that means nothing and depression will always be inevitable. My boss who is also my mentor made me realize that my spiritual life has probably taken a back seat the past few weeks that's why I am feeling burnt out. She told  me that no matter how tiring the legal practice is, if we are intimate with God, then nothing could ever be so distressing. We will always have hope, joy and peace. This is primarily why I have overcome that brief season of gloom. I followed Atty. Paulino's advice and I spent quality time with the Lord every single morning and tried my best not to rush my prayer or Bible reading. I also prayed for each case and every client. I depended on God for everything. She also told me that I should never let these cases bring me down. I have to be professional and compartmentalize my personal life and work. Mixing the two will simply have catastrophic consequences. "Don't feel bad when you encounter problems in court or with your clients. Just do your best and glorify Him in everything."

5. GO BACK TO YOUR PASSION. I have to admit, I'm really enjoying my income right now. After all, I was a broke law student for five years before getting regular paychecks. However, money alone is never a sufficient motivation for work. If you want to always work inspired, then renew your passion and retell the story of why you applied for your job in the first place. For me? It was the thought of helping other people achieve justice that makes my heart race and brain working. I strive to remind myself everyday that my work, no matter how mundane and frustrating at times, has a higher purpose and that this is precisely what I am called to do. At the end of the day, if you love your work, and are passionate about it, then there can be no room for burn out. 

Life is simply too short to be spent on wearing ourselves out. Always, always find the time to relish the the many blessings we have and rest in the thought that your work is a gift from above (unless of course it's of a criminal/illegal nature). Enjoy the week ahead and be amazing at whatever your hands find to do! God bless. 

DELIGHT

This love which confounds my reason,
Washes my deepest, darkest stains,
Replaces my sorrow with joy and passion,
Has liberated me and broke all chains.


This I can truly say is my purpose,
To gaze upon, dwell in, relish and savor,
The beauty that restores my brokenness,
Filling my soul with so much wonder.


More of Him and less of me, less of the world,
Even if it would be the death of a million desires,
I would still choose His face, His voice, His word,
This surrender is not even a sacrifice
...because His presence will be my greatest delight.

How Love Changed Me

On a beautiful Saturday morning, my man and I headed to the beach just to enjoy each other's company and satisfy our four-months long craving for the sand and the sea. We only had until sunset before going back home so we savored every second we were there-- took lots of pictures, ate exquisite food, swam for hours, and breathed in a lot of fresh air. My favorite part of it all was when we sat by the shore, dug our feet in the sand and talked.

We love to talk. Our conversations would go from trivial to profound ones, from law and politics to the dumbest ideas in our heads, from those filled with laughter and giggles to heated arguments. Whatever. We just love to talk. But for that particular morning by the beach, we were pretty deep in our thoughts.

"How have I changed in the past year?" I asked. He stares steady in my eyes and smiles. He then enumerated the many things that I have improved on in the 13 months of being together. "You're more thoughtful now, more caring, and more healthy in your eating habits." And the list went on. I can tell he is very happy about these changes. And I am too. Being the proud and overly confident woman that I am (sad but true) I would have never thought that there were so many dark things in my heart that needed cleaning.

It was only when I discovered true love that this proverbial spell which I was oblivious to was broken. I was a very selfish person and I probably still am, and I didn't know that I cared very little about the welfare of others. When Erick first brought this up last year, I was completely shocked and offended. But then through much prayer and reading of Scripture, this confrontation slowly humbled me and I started making strong resolves to actually change.

When I come to think of it, falling in love can be such a miracle. It's "magical", yes, but I think the more apt word to describe it is "miraculous". Because you know, it's not just the giddy feelings that make it pretty amazing but the lasting effect it has on you. I still feel the butterflies when I'm with him, make no mistake about it. When a man like Erick pursues you every single day and makes you feel like you're the most beautiful woman in the world, then sure, you will always feel the rush of young love. Sparks fly all the time and sometimes I hear an orchestra playing in the background when we're holding hands. Haha. And I like that a lot. But what I truly appreciate about loving him and being loved by him is way it has changed me, for the better.

I am definitely not the woman I used to be. The conscious effort I make in actually putting others' interests above mine, of not limiting my charitable deeds to "outreach programs" but to everyday care for the poor, of building up my godly character and not just my "knowledge" of the Bible, all these things were a direct outcome of being around my Erick.

Ours is not a perfect relationship because we're both sinners and in constant need of grace. But I love making our bond stronger because it's making me a better person in the process. And I think that's what relationships are all about, to make you godlier and more gracious.

I honestly haven't been more happy in my life than now that I am with him. But more importantly, I have never been so aware of my shortcomings and sinfulness until this boy pointed it out to me. And I have never been more eager to change my ways... because if we don't become better persons by being together, then there's no point to all the romantic dates, endless laughter, sweet nothings and walks in the beach.

The Worst and Best Things About the Bar Exam

   

          It has been two months since I took the Bar Exam but the memories of what I went through still linger. I find it challenging to describe my experience because there really is nothing like it. In legal jargon, it's called sui generis or a class in itself. The Bar Exam is sui generis because I can't compare it with any other. Is it like the final exams in law school? Not at all. Is it the same with the aptitude tests in major universities? No, not really. Is it like a whole day of the debate rounds? Not even close. Is it akin to being punched in the stomach every second? Going through a breakup? Or seeing your house burn down? Yes. Almost.

           In preparing for and taking the Bar Exams, you suffer physically, mentally, emotionally, and psychologically. So when friends andmily asked me, "How was the exam?" I honestly struggled for words... so I just ended up... crying. Haha! But anyway, here is a very weak attempt to describe the animal that is the Bar Exam. It's a different experience for every bar candidate but there are universal sentiments we all share and I think some of them are written below.

....The Worst Things

  

Four Years of Prepartion for a Four-Week Exam

           Yep, that's the prime of your youth right there! “Wasted away” in spending twelve hours a day studying and being grilled in the classroom. The average law student spends around four to six years in law school, some even go so long as eight or ten. That is a lot of blood, sweat and tears. And when you actually graduate, the battle isn't finished yet. You don't really feel like celebrating or happily throwing your graduation hats up in the air. This is because the real fight has just begun. In the next six months, your life will be centered on nothing but the Bar Review, probably the biggest warfare of your life. 

            I started mine on the second week of May. It was initially exciting but when you get to the third month of doing nothing but STUDY, you get extremely bored and exhausted. Nakakasuka, grabe. I studied from 8am up to 10pm, usually in my little corner in my rented house. I was alone most of the time and had no one to talk to but my Mom when she comes home at night. You sometimes reach a point of being so burned out you despise even the thought of studying. When that happened to me, I decided to change my study pattern and move out of my cave. I joined my boyfriend in the library and coffee shops and studying became a little fun again. The routine and feeling of drudgery can be a killer. You wake up doing the exact same thing you did the day before and with almost no social life. The hardest part about the review is "cramming" everything that I learned in the past five years in just five months. That is insane if you ask me but that's exactly what we did. Essentially, you have to finish a book you read for one semester in law school in just two days during review. My brain literally hurt that time.

The Pressure is Real and Almost Inevitable

          Imagine, all my hard work and sacrifices for half a decade can now be shattered in just one wrong answer in an exam, in a single stroke of a pen. The expectations of my family and my entire future is hanging on the balance and you feel this tension with you in every paragraph you read and every doctrine you're trying to memorize. What if I don't know the answer to the Civil Procedure question? What if Commercial Law is too difficult? What if I haven't studied Political Law enough? What if I fail the bar? What if I will never be a lawyer? Making sure that anxiety doesn't get the best of you while studying is a skill in itself. 

           And then comes exam day. You walk to your assigned room as if you are walking towards the electric chair. As you begin to observe your fellow "convicts", there is a certain look that is etched on their faces and yours... The look of fear and panic. A lot of my friends said that the first time they wrote their answer, their muscles refused to move. The tip of the pen couldn't touch the paper, no matter how hard they tried to write. They were immobilized by the pressure. And so was I. I experienced something like it while studying for Commercial Law. I literally had a mental block the day before. I couldn't understand anything I read for the subject and just before I went to bed, I had an emotional breakdown. I was literally on the floor sobbing my eyes out only because I felt like I was going to fail the exam which I haven't taken yet. It's irrational I know but the intensity of the pressure just gets to you and you just break.   

It Will Suck Your Finances Dry

     

  Let's not talk about law school because I'm sure my parents spent millions for my education then. The Bar Exam alone costs a lot, I mean a lot. Enrolling in a review center cost me Php15,000 (Jurists Online Review) while Erick spent Php18,000 for Ateneo de Davao review classes. The house was Php10,000 a month, the books and review materials were probably around Php5,000, photocopies were Php2,000, supplies (like printer, pens, papers, sticky notes, notebooks, and what not) for about Php4,000, weekly allowance was Php3,000, dormitory in Manila was Php25,000 for two months and another Php20,000 for airfare, payments for Bar application and other random expenses in Manila. So roughly that's Php200,000 in just six months. I probably spent more. Whew! I know my parents had to sell properties, deprive themselves of certain needs and made other sacrifices just to afford my review and that's probably one of the worst things about the bar exam, it drains your resources in an instant.

You Will Be At Your Worst Shape When Taking The Exam

            I tried everything to get healthy and be at my perfect physical condition before taking the bar exam. I exercised regularly, ate a lot of vegetables (unwillingly), drank vitamins, and went to see the doctor as soon as my hyper-acidity was acting up. The day before the first Sunday of the Bar, I made sure I ate right, I felt relaxed and prepared my sleeping pattern so I would get a full sleep the night before. But there are just things that are beyond your control. At 8:30pm on Saturday night, I was already in bed and tried to sleep. But I couldn't. It was only at 11:00 when I felt sleepy. I dozed off but woke up at 1:30am and never went back to sleep again. So on the first Sunday of the Bar, they said the most important Sunday of all four, I only had 2 hours and thirty minutes of sleep. Fantastic. 

             Political Law exam in the morning was for almost five hours. We had 30-45minutes of break for lunch and that's where I screwed up big time. I lost my lunchbox and had to go out of UST to find food. It was a long walk and the heat was exhausting... I felt so frustrated because I couldn't see any of my friends nor contact them because our phones were locked down. I was in such a hurry that the fastest thing I could grab was a chicken croissant and iced tea in Starbucks. The thing is, I'm not used to meals without rice so this took a toll on my Labor Law. In the afternoon, at around 3:00pm in the middle of my exam, I almost fainted. My world was spinning and I had to hold tight to my chair so I wouldn't fall off. As much as I wanted to pass out or vomit, I grit my teeth and finished Labor. Lack of sleep, exhaustion from the morning exam and hunger made the afternoon subject a living hell.

Your Mental Capacity is Pushed To The Limit

           During the Bar month, there is what we call "Preweek". That's the preparation you make the week before the Sunday. This to me is one of the toughest mental acrobat I had to carry out. After Poli and Labor, I had to quickly move on from the heartache and physical pains of the day before so I could prepare for the next exam. I usually spend Mondays just resting, sleeping and going out of the dormitory to unwind. But from Tuesday to Saturday, I had to divide my time to study for say, Civil and Tax. That is an overwhelming amount of information in five days. And the excruciating cycle goes on Sunday after Sunday. And when the exam day comes, you have to squeeze out everything that you know just to give the best answer for every question. The time pressure makes the thinking extra difficult. You not only have to think the correct answer but to logically explain it in flawless English grammar and excellent handwriting as well. One of the most heartbreaking things about answering is when you have studied so hard for a particular topic but it doesn’t get asked in the exam or when asked, it is phrased in such a way that you absolutely have no idea how to answer it.  These are the times when I silently breathe out the phrase, “Lord, tabaaaaaang!!!!” 

….The Best Things

Character-Building 

            All the painful polishing becomes worth it because in the end, your character and discipline shines through. The ability to say no to instant gratification, to meet deadlines promptly, to persevere in the midst of tremendous trials, and to come out of it stronger is one of the blessings of the bar exam. When I was first year in Ateneo Law School, I wasn’t able to meet the grade requirement and got dismissed after one year because I didn’t know how to persevere. Five years later in my review, I pushed through every personal struggle and wiped my tears dry no matter how painful the situation is just to study. I was forced to say NO to a lot of things in order to say YES to my daily readings. There was simply no excuse. I learned that this kind of attitude is essential not only to survive in life but to thrive at it. There will always be drama, tragedies, heartaches, family problems and other legitimate concerns but after we cry about it for a time, we should stand back up and move forward.    

Learning to Love Learning 

           I don’t know about you but I’m such a late bloomer. It was only on my third year in law school that I truly embraced studying as something that I am passionate about. This is truer during my six months of review. Because studying for ten hours a day, six days a week can be so routinary and boring, I had to really learn how to love learning. On most days, I actually enjoyed the feeling of understanding something new or mastering a concept I have already known before. It is quite pleasurable. The physical exhaustion is there (oh yes!) but the incentive to that is learning something that will someday help save lives or give liberty to a person in need of it. Studying can be the means to an end, which is becoming a lawyer yes... But it should also be the end itself, that is, studying for the sake of studying and actually enjoying the same.

Falling Into the Arms of Your Friends and Family 

             Since you're in such a challenging season of your life, friends and family tend to pamper you a lot. I got so many encouraging messages and even gifts from friends all over the country. Also, one of the things I am so grateful for is the support system I found in Cor Jesu Law Bar Operations. They did such an excellent job in cheering us up, taking care of us and making sure that every after exam we were fed well and given flowers (flowersss!!!). It wasnt just a bar operations, it was family. 

      

              When you’re answering for the very last exam, that’s when you feel the fatigue the most. It’s like you just wanna get Legal Ethics done and over with. There was no happier moment than when I put the pen down, submitted my booklet to the proctor, walked out of UST with my boyfriend and cousin, and found my family in the midst of the wild crowd in España. I swear it felt like everything was in slow-mo. There was massive celebrations all around, with bands, fireworks and confetti in the air. It was a struggle just to get through the hundreds of people waiting for the examiners outside. And as I walked towards my sister who was holding up balloons and flowers, I felt sense of relief... That finally, its over! Both of us went hysterical and started jumping around in excitement. Then after two months of being in Manila I finally saw Mommy and Daddy. I saw just how happy they were to greet me and I almost teared up… They rushed to embrace me tight and that by far was one of the most wonderful moments of my life. It made all the month-long torture… absolutely sweet.   

  

Letting go and Letting God 

             What is the most beneficial thing about the whole experience for me is how it made me draw closer to God. I personally believe that you can study all you want, be the top of your class, or memorize every provision in the Codals, but at the end of the day, God is still sovereign over your performance in the exam. I never missed a Sunday of going to church when I was still reviewing in Davao not because I needed favor from God or I want Him to make me a lawyer, but simply because I needed Him. His presence was the only thing that gave me a deep sense of joy and peace amidst the terrifying obstacles I faced daily. Whenever I would have anxiety attacks, I just get anchored in who He is and draw strength from the assurance that I am deeply loved by my Lord. 

             The Bar Exam brought me to the lowest points of my life where I was made desperate for God. The awesome part about it is that He carried me through it all. Every Sunday morning of the Bar month, I would wake up at 3:30am and just kneel down in prayer. Without that, I would crumble and fall the rest of the day. All my fears, my weaknesses, my insecurities and hardships were laid down before Him at every turn. The Bar Exam has taught me to constantly depend on Jesus and His sustaining grace day in and day out because that’s how it should be. Now, even without the exam, I strive to live that kind of life—to be always dependent on Jesus and trust Him to be in control of it all. Waiting for the results takes a lot of letting go and letting God too. Every single day, I am reminded of the upcoming results of the bar and I would feel my heart skip a beat. But I have come to a point where I just trust Him for whatever the outcome will be. All I know is that God is good and He is sovereign. And that’s what gives me a sound sleep at night.  

Esteem for Lawyers

               Going through the bar exam made me admire lawyers much more, as in exponentially more! For someone to survive that kind of torture and actually pass is such a mighty feat. I look at lawyers never the same again after that “hell month”. Everytime I interact with lawyers, it’s like I wanna bring out the jologs in me and scream out, “Woooh! Iba ka idol! Pa-fansign!!!” Hahaha! Because of the bar exams, I couldn’t possibly take this legal profession flippantly. It takes a lot of mental stamina, discipline and inner strength to be a lawyer and they have my highest respect. That’s why I no longer easily believe someone when he says, “bobo yung abugado nay un eh” because really, you can’t possibly pass the bar exams and be stupid because it can’t be done by sheer luck. That person is truly intelligent. And that is one of the best things about the bar exam… It humbles you and makes you feel unworthy of such a high calling. And now that I am working in the law firm, I get more and more thrilled in anticipation to be actually called an “Attorney” and actually do legal action in court. It would be such a treat if that day would come but for now, all I can do is trust Him and pray, “Lord, tabaaaaaaang!!!” 

New Year, New Home!

When I say home, I mean “dormitory”.

It has been such an exhausting day of moving my things from Kidapawan and my rented house in Davao into this new space. I dreaded for this day to come. I hate moving. And I hate that I have been doing it more often than the average person. In a span of 10 years I have lived in 13 different places and they are as follows:

St. Mary’s Dormitory in Cebu—2005

My grandmother’s house in Cebu—2006-2009

Fairview, Quezon City—2009-2010

Marcos Highway, Antipolo—2011

Taguig City—2011-2012

Boni Avenue, Mandaluyong—2012

BF Homes, Paranaque—2013

Studio 1, Alabang—2014  

Studio 2, Alabang—2015

Almanza, Las Pinas—2015

Estrada Third, Digos City—2015-2016

Portville Townhouse, Davao City—2016

Golden Panda Dorm, Manila—2016 Bar Review

                …and here we are now. How annoying is that? Recalling all these places brought back memories of how immensely stressed I was in the process of moving. There is always a valid reason for every transfer, most of the time it’s because of school or changing circumstances in the family. And as much as I wished I didn’t move around so much, I did. A lot.

                This morning, I prayed that God would help me on my moving out. I anticipated the physical and emotional strain and I just needed His grace so much. Thankfully, it wasn’t as horrendous as I expected. Our driver was there to give me the helping hand I badly needed. I packed my things early this morning, loaded them in the car and left Kidapawan. I dropped off my sister in SM Lanang and proceeded to our rented house in Portville where most of my things are in. I packed them in boxes and plastic bags and headed to my dormitory.

I arrived here at around 1 o’clock and finished the cleaning, organizing and what have you at 5 o’clock. It was a massive mess but I did it. Yay! A sense of fulfillment is surging in my heart right now as I enjoy the fruit of my labor. Moments ago this was only a dusty old space and now it has become my very cozy room. My small sanctuary. My new home.

While I was folding my clothes earlier, I had plenty of time to reflect. I realized that 2016 is the year that I moved the most, literally and figuratively. There were so many “new things” that happened. I graduated in law school. I fell inlove and now have a boyfriend (which a lot of you want me to blog about, haha!) I moved to Davao City for my review. I moved again to Manila for the bar preparations. I took the bar exam. I moved back to Kidapawan for a month of rest. I applied for a job in a law office in Davao and got hired. I start working tomorrow. Oh wow 2016, what a ride!

In all these variations there was however, one thing that was constant… JESUS. And this is the part where I get mushy because conclusions to blog entries are supposed to be like that right? Haha! But really, where will I be without the grace of God? The difficult situations I had to face, the battles I had to fight, the personal struggles that brought so much pain, the many, many challenges and changes that came my way in 2016 would have broken me to pieces if it were not for God’s love for me. This love was immovable. Unchanging. With Him, there is no “variation or shadow of turning (James 1:17).” No matter how circumstances get unpredictable and how things shift in a blink of an eye, Jesus loves us just the same and that is all the assurance we need in this life.

Right about now, the plan is to get settled in Davao City and work in the law office for the next couple of years. I am hoping very hard that after ten years of being restless, I would finally plant my roots deep here, Lord willing. But even if things do not go as planned, or for some reason I will have to move to another house or apartment (again!!!) I know I will be okay in the end. Everything around me may change but Christ never will.

Matthew 28:20 says, “…lo, I will be with you always, even unto the end of the world.” I hung on to this promise many times before and more so now. Wherever I was and wherever I will be, Jesus promises that He will be there with me. What assurance! It was this steady sense of security in the love of God that got me through 2016 and I know it will be the same for the year ahead. Come what may.