How Love Changed Me

On a beautiful Saturday morning, my man and I headed to the beach just to enjoy each other's company and satisfy our four-months long craving for the sand and the sea. We only had until sunset before going back home so we savored every second we were there-- took lots of pictures, ate exquisite food, swam for hours, and breathed in a lot of fresh air. My favorite part of it all was when we sat by the shore, dug our feet in the sand and talked.

We love to talk. Our conversations would go from trivial to profound ones, from law and politics to the dumbest ideas in our heads, from those filled with laughter and giggles to heated arguments. Whatever. We just love to talk. But for that particular morning by the beach, we were pretty deep in our thoughts.

"How have I changed in the past year?" I asked. He stares steady in my eyes and smiles. He then enumerated the many things that I have improved on in the 13 months of being together. "You're more thoughtful now, more caring, and more healthy in your eating habits." And the list went on. I can tell he is very happy about these changes. And I am too. Being the proud and overly confident woman that I am (sad but true) I would have never thought that there were so many dark things in my heart that needed cleaning.

It was only when I discovered true love that this proverbial spell which I was oblivious to was broken. I was a very selfish person and I probably still am, and I didn't know that I cared very little about the welfare of others. When Erick first brought this up last year, I was completely shocked and offended. But then through much prayer and reading of Scripture, this confrontation slowly humbled me and I started making strong resolves to actually change.

When I come to think of it, falling in love can be such a miracle. It's "magical", yes, but I think the more apt word to describe it is "miraculous". Because you know, it's not just the giddy feelings that make it pretty amazing but the lasting effect it has on you. I still feel the butterflies when I'm with him, make no mistake about it. When a man like Erick pursues you every single day and makes you feel like you're the most beautiful woman in the world, then sure, you will always feel the rush of young love. Sparks fly all the time and sometimes I hear an orchestra playing in the background when we're holding hands. Haha. And I like that a lot. But what I truly appreciate about loving him and being loved by him is way it has changed me, for the better.

I am definitely not the woman I used to be. The conscious effort I make in actually putting others' interests above mine, of not limiting my charitable deeds to "outreach programs" but to everyday care for the poor, of building up my godly character and not just my "knowledge" of the Bible, all these things were a direct outcome of being around my Erick.

Ours is not a perfect relationship because we're both sinners and in constant need of grace. But I love making our bond stronger because it's making me a better person in the process. And I think that's what relationships are all about, to make you godlier and more gracious.

I honestly haven't been more happy in my life than now that I am with him. But more importantly, I have never been so aware of my shortcomings and sinfulness until this boy pointed it out to me. And I have never been more eager to change my ways... because if we don't become better persons by being together, then there's no point to all the romantic dates, endless laughter, sweet nothings and walks in the beach.